Crisis team helps Fairport's Class of '07 deal with tragedies

A spate of tragedies connected to Fairport High School's Class of 2007 presents a challenge for the district's crisis team, which is trying to remain upbeat and help students have fun this year.

The latest was the Sept. 21 death of Kathleen Short of Perinton, the mother of 2007 graduate Elias Hayes. She died after the motorcycle she was riding was hit by car on Lakeshore Boulevard.

It was the seventh recent fatality to touch the district, starting with the five girls who were killed in a motor vehicle accident in East Bloomfield on June 26, shortly after they graduated and were starting their summer vacation.

"We don't have a black cloud hanging over our heads," said high school Principal David Paddock. "We don't have bad luck. We just have a time when this is happening, and we pray it's not going to happen anymore."

Paddock praised the 18-member crisis team of counselors, psychologists and other school officials who have reached out and been available to students since the end of the last school year.

"It's been a challenge, but at the same time kids are very resilient," he said. "It depends on how directly it's related to the students. Sometimes, when it's a parent of a student, not as many students are affected."

Paddock said he received about 10 calls last weekend from former students asking about Hayes.

He said when 2007 grad David Anderson II died Sept. 6 in his dorm room at Brigham Young University in Utah, crisis team members knew he had been in the choir and on the volleyball team, so counselors were dispatched to those groups to see if students needed help.

BYU spokesperson Carri Jenkins said the review of Anderson's death was not complete yet, but "there is no suspicion of foul play."

Paddock said when a situation arises, crisis team members gather and devise a plan on how to address it, noting that each is dealt with based on its circumstances, but there is a similarity in various responses.

He said in most cases, it's just reaching out to those who need support, going to calling hours and dealing with the media.

"Our crisis team is always on alert," Paddock said. "I have never been more proud of them. They always just know how to respond and how to react."

Paddock said there's only so much the team can do for recent graduates, since many have gone away to college, but they reach out to them the best they can by talking to them on the phone or inviting them to the school when they're in town.

"Quite honestly, we're the second line of support," Paddock said, noting families are first. "It seems students gravitate to the school. I think the best thing is the kids are together and they're supporting each other.

"It's always important for us to move forward," he added. "We're never going to forget. That's a given, but we're moving on."

Anthony Pisani, director of Strong Family Therapy Services at the University of Rochester, said Fairport "has done a marvelous job" of bringing the community together to support students and families.

"After the death of the students this summer, the community followed almost what you would see in a textbook for community support," he said. "Not only did they gather to have forums for people to talk and share their experiences, but even found the right moment to close the (commemorations) at the high school and move on to more personal forms of support.

"Of course, no one's life is ever the same after a loss of life like that, but people were able to move forward with their daily lives," Pisani added.

Pisani, who has a doctorate degree in clinical psychology, said subsequent events can often regenerate feelings of devastation and shock originally felt with the first event.

"It's important to know, as we say in our family therapy service, 'Everybody needs help sometimes,'" he said. "It's good for people to know that there is a whole range of support available."

Pisani said most people find adequate support through their families, churches and communities to get them through a tragic event, but "there will be a handful or sometimes more" of people for whom it will be helpful to talk with someone outside the situation.

"The key for everybody is to talk and process their feelings," Pisani said. "We know from research that the lasting negative effects of trauma are reduced when people have a chance to talk or write about the trauma soon after it happens."

He said that can be confusing for some parents, because children will tell them they're OK - so adults need to watch and listen. He said signs to look for are irritability, kids being distracted, or a preoccupation with safety or illness that previously didn't exist.

"The good news is that as the students of Fairport have shown us, most kids are quite strong and really are OK if they say they are," Pisani said. "And most adults, while perhaps hurt or scared, will also cope with losses and tragedies in their communities."

Perinton-Fairport Post writer Denise M. Champagne can be reached at (585) 394-0770, Ext. 352, or at dchampagne@mpnewspapers.com.