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The Daily Register - Harrisburg, IL
My attempt to get back my somewhat creative juices that had evaporated with stale milk and juice left in the sippy cups under my furniture.
Summertime Blues
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By Jessica Shaffer
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Aug. 9, 2012 12:01 a.m.



July was not a good month for me. I can blame it on the heat but in the end I know I only have myself to blame. I think sometimes itís easy to get lost behind the closed curtains and the numbing sound of TV in the background; that itís far too easy to stay put then to move forward. Itís weird how I count my life in cycles. With each season there is something new to look too. In the winter my son turned one. In the spring, Addison turned three and family came to visit. This fall Addison starts preschool. But this summer? I think I had the summertime blues.


As my housework piled up and commitments were neglected, I found it more satisfying to sit in the dark. I donít think I felt overly sad. I just felt....blah.



This Monday when I woke up, I felt different. I felt like I had been sitting in pity long enough. This Monday I dug out my big girl panties from the bottom of my dresser drawer, and that day I put them on. They felt a little tight...but probably from sitting around so much. That morning I put on actual clothes after getting the kids dressed too, and we went to the store. I know it sounds simple, just going to the store, but to me, it was a big deal. I enjoyed it, and my poor poor children, I know they enjoyed it too. Tonight, Iím checking my e-mail. I have 601 unread messages. Iím turning over every dusty rock to check on the things left in my cloudy fog.



Itís not easy to say in such a public way that for over a month I was not myself. Itís especially hard for me to ask for help. Iíd cut my own foot off before admitting that it was stuck in a bear trap and that I needed help. That way at least I know I tried.



But I think Iím better now. And I donít think there is any cause for alarm. My kids didnít wallow in filth or eat crumbs off the floor.  My husband may have had to do his own laundry, but Iím sure heís fine. Like I said, I think I was just....blah, which in my opinion we all deserve to get like every once in awhile. A mental vacation maybe?



And to anyone who reads this who finds themselves feeling ďblahĒ, just know that if you neglect the laundry long enough, eventually youíll have to put on the big girl panties from the bottom of your dresser drawer.



xoxo

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